I was never really teased as a child. Growing up, and now as an adult, it has always just been stares, curious questions, and comments. Some comments are innocent, but there have also been the “uncomplimentary compliment” kind, which are annoying. Fairly recently I had a woman whom I did not know say to me: “Your eyes are SO unique! They are so small!” For me it can sometimes be awkward when strangers make comments. I kind of just nodded and walked away.
A lot of times, I forget that I even have BPES, and I see myself as normal. I like my unique look. But then, I will meet someone for the first time and I will get the “What is your heritage?” question. I can tell they are expecting me to say I’m Asian, and are shocked when I say, “I’m Irish.”
I have no problem explaining my condition to close friends. But sometimes I struggle with whether or not to take the time to explain about BPES to a stranger. A lot of times it is just easier to say that I was born this way and shrug it off. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I just started singing the Lady Gaga song haha.
I think what has held me back is that I have always been a private person, and believe that my life is not another person’s business. But now that I’m older, I wonder if I should take the time to educate people.
That is part of the reason why my sister and I decided to start this web site. I am trying to be more open, and this is the first step. As of now, I am still debating about using any real pictures of me, or just using my Bitmoji avatar. I know that the blog part of our site will make a lot more sense and be more impactful with real pictures, so I think I am going to go out of my comfort zone and share. But that is the point, it is ‘out of my comfort zone.’